A rough translation of the latest NUFC statement

One of the big bones of contention amongst the fans currently is the level of communication from within St James' Park. Perhaps I should say lack of communication? Maybe even complete blackout from within the corridors of power at the Cathedral on the Hill?

Which is why it was surprising and refreshing to catch wind of the fact that NUFC were planning on releasing some form of statement. It's not the done thing at the club these days so it would be nice to hear a bit about what is going on from those upstairs instead of them leaving Alan Pardew to play the media flute.

I really can't say that I'm surprised at what I'm going to type, but in a way I wish that they'd not bothered. What was served up was one of the most patronising, self-serving, pointless statements that I've ever read. If you haven't read it for yourself yet you can view it on the official club website here or alternatively you can just read on as it's here in its full glory.

Here goes...

"Now that the transfer window has closed, we have had some time to reflect on the business we have conducted over the summer."

"Our aim was to secure young players who represented value for money and could add real strength to the squad. The majority of our transfer dealings were completed in the early part of the window and we feel we have signed some players of exceptional quality. Yohan Cabaye, Sylvain Marveaux, Mehdi Abeid, Demba Ba and Gabriel Obertan were all brought in early and we have seen these players settle quickly into the squad and perform well on the pitch."

"Earlier this week we were delighted to sign Davide Santon from Inter Milan to fill our left-back position after the departure of Jose Enrique. Davide is an excellent young prospect and we're sure he'll be another superb addition to the squad. We also welcomed young goalkeeper Rob Elliot from Charlton Athletic who will help us retain healthy competition for that position after loaning out Fraser Forster to Celtic."

"Of course we had also hoped to secure a further striker in the window, in addition to Demba Ba. Work to bring a striker into the club began early in the summer. Negotiations were complex and protracted and unfortunately it was disappointing that ultimately we could not secure our priority target."

"Whilst we did turn our attention to alternative prospects in the latter stages of the window, we have a very clear transfer policy and will not make knee-jerk decisions at the last-minute which are not in the best interests of the club. We understand that supporters will feel frustrated that we did not sign another striker during the window, but it was not for lack of trying that we did not bring our final target in."

So what does this tell us? Well to be honest it's not a lot different to what fans have been saying anyway. I've not heard many people slag off the new signings and most recognise that they could turn out to be very good for us. Fair play on that one.

It's the bit about trying for the second striker that gets me. It strikes me that the board don't really "try" that much at all, which gets hidden behind this current business model where the best interests of the club are, apparently, at heart.

The bit about not making knee-jerk decisions also made me chuckle. Like sacking Chris Hughton wasn't a knee-jerk reaction. Like bidding for Charles N'Zogbia, Kieron Richardson and Bryan Ruiz wasn't knee-jerk. Like letting last seasons Player of the Season leave for absolutely nothing wasn't knee-jerk. Like only selling away tickets to people who pay £25 for a membership after the Darlington fiasco wasn't knee-jerk.

It seems that there have been plenty of of knee-jerk decisions to me.

It just makes me chuckle at how little thought and effort has been put into this statement. Once again they had a chance to really explain things and set out some ambitions rather than keeping us in the dark. Unfortunately it almost seems as though writing this was something that somebody didn't actually want to do. It doesn't even sound finished for fucks sake. Where is that PR woman? She needs sacking.

To sign off with I'll once again reiterate that I never expected anything else but the bare minimum from Fatman and Throbbin. The disdain they show towards the fans is incomprehensible at times considering the fact that we are actually customers in one form or another. It would be nice to be treat like one for a change...

Rather than be treat as an inconvenience.